JB Glossinger [00:00:06]:
Good morning, and welcome to MorningCoach® Today. I am so glad you're with us. Hey. It's Jamie. It's November 18, 2024, ready to go. Episode 5519, and we have got a great week planned for you. Before we do, just remember your metaphysical morning ritual. Take some time for self care.
JB Glossinger [00:00:34]:
Listen to this coach guest. Get here as much as you can. 3 or 4 times a week is great. You know, 5 times is even better. You're really rocketed if you can get this every morning. Alright? Let's get our our 7 p's in place. Let's make sure we have the right perspective. Realize you can make a difference.
JB Glossinger [00:00:50]:
You can do what you need to do. Set the right priorities today. Let's get some improved performance in everything that we do. Have some patience and posture. Stay present. Stay present, and then, of course, persist every day. Alright? And then we wanna get our planner open, rock that planner, and let's get after it. Alright.
JB Glossinger [00:01:09]:
This week, we got a good one. We're gonna talk about victim mentality, the loser's limp from football. I'll go over a little bit about what that is, something we call that. And as I used to coach football, we'll translate that a little bit in some cool stuff this week. Tomorrow, we got our book study. We've been talking about overthinking some good techniques to help you with that. Wednesday, we've got focus on the restart, the wash, rinse, repeat that I teach. We're gonna really get ourselves organized and energized, for the new year as we're coming into, obviously, Thanksgiving and and the holiday time.
JB Glossinger [00:01:39]:
Ask JB. I'm gonna talk about how do we stick with it? How do you keep going when things when the going gets tough and the tough get going? Right? Friday, we got one things are not working, getting through financially. How do we do that? Saturday, of course, doctor Paul Lovett. And then, Sunday, we got some discussion on having some energy during the weekend. So really awesome week planned, good energy as always, and just, you know, wonderful wonderful things happen. And remember to get in the community, check the meetups. If you wanna come join one of the wonderful community led meetups, more than welcome to come. Lot of interesting things going on in those meetups.
JB Glossinger [00:02:14]:
It'd be great to see you in one of those, really cool things happening. So we're starting to finalize the year. Right? We're getting organized. We're getting ourselves in a in a great place. We got the right morning routine. Now it's a matter about just approaching the day with the right perspective and having the right mentality day in and day out. And what we wanna talk about is overcoming the victim mentality or what we used to call the loser's limp. And, basically, what that is is in football, it happens a lot.
JB Glossinger [00:02:42]:
Right? So in football, you're in front of everybody, especially the position I played. So I played corner, which is a cornerback. So I would cover the wide receiver. If you think about a football game, I was on the far outside And when, you know, they ran down the field, you got somebody fast fast. You're all alone out there. Like, the whole stadium sees you make the mistakes. And so one of the things that we call is being burnt like toast. Okay? Y'all seem burnt toast.
JB Glossinger [00:03:06]:
And, basically, being burnt by like, toast is when the wide receiver just runs by you, you don't recover, and he just, you know, get they also call it being Moss. Randy Moss was this great receiver. But, anyways, you just get behind you, and they throw a long pass. They catch it, and they score a touchdown. You got burnt. Right? It's a it's a horrible thing. I learned to take rejection at a young age because as a quarterback, you will get burnt. No matter how good you are, you will get burnt.
JB Glossinger [00:03:30]:
And I'll never forget when I really realized I could play football is when I'd went to high school, didn't play in college, but my buddy, Manny Olague, still loving to death, one of my best friends, played at University of Arizona, just a stud. Could have played to any college that he wanted to, had some problems, walked into my gym in Tucson, Arizona, and and he was £280. He said, JB, I wanna get back in shape. And I said, alright. Started getting back in shape, and this is when I was running gyms, and I was still young then, probably 24, 23. Maybe yeah. 23 or 20 4 in that age group. And, we started training.
JB Glossinger [00:04:03]:
Tried training Manny. He was a couple years younger than me. Got him in shape, and we got a phone call from this team called Tucson Dogs, that Manny wanted to you know, they wanted him to play. And Manny said, I'm I'm not gonna play unless JB comes. And I'm like, I don't wanna play football anymore, man. I haven't played since high school. I was coaching, football, and that's what I was going to school to be, but I had went out to Arizona, for a break, and I was running gyms out there. And I said, gosh.
JB Glossinger [00:04:25]:
Dang it. Alright. I'll play. So I started playing with cowboy. We call him cowboy, Manny, and he was a safety, and he was running about 220 and just a machine. And I was on the outside, and and the team that we ended up working with was the Rattlers and the arena league. And there were a lot of kids from the PAC schools, Arizona, Washington, Oregon, really great players. And here I was a guy that didn't play in college that just came out of high school and was trained in Manny, and I was on the outside.
JB Glossinger [00:04:51]:
And I ended up competing with everybody and winning the starting quarterback job, and I was competing against all these kids from all these big schools, Arizona being one of them, that they were really good back then. I'll never forget, I was on the corner, and this is when I really got the belief that I can play. And I was going against this guy from Arizona, and he was solid. Right? And so I was bumping and running him, getting in his face, and we're in coverage. And he I he couldn't catch a ball on me all day. And so that's when I really figured, hey, I'm gonna play for for a little while and I'm playing a lot of football. And it was really weird because I was one of those guys that just didn't just didn't really grow until I was a little bit later, and I still was never that big. I was £595, but I could cover.
JB Glossinger [00:05:31]:
You know? And so what happens to take this story all the way back home, sorry to share that with you, but some people like to hear the history. I haven't shared that with many people, but that's how I really got my my start in football. But going back to the losers' limp is what happens is when you're out there on the outside and you're playing corner and you get burnt, and like I said, I was pretty good, but I get burnt once in a while when if you didn't have a strong mentality, you would limp. You would limp off. Like, oh, my leg. I pulled up my leg. I hurt my knee. Right? And so it's kind of a loser's limp.
JB Glossinger [00:06:03]:
You're like, oh, man. He got me because I was hurt. And you're you're creating this victim mentality. You're creating this, like, kind of an excuse when the truth is he was just better at that play. And as you as as you do things in life, right, and as you do more things, you get rid of that mentality that, oh, I'm a victim or, oh, I've got this loser. So I'm and you're able to focus on progressive ideas. Okay. What did I learn from that? What what happened in that situation? Right? Again, it's a self awareness thing.
JB Glossinger [00:06:32]:
And you you'll see it in high school. If you ever go to athletics, right, you'll see somebody make a bad play or do something, and then all of a sudden they're hurt. They're doing that to really cover up from the fact that he made a mistake. That's a character flaw. It's actually a very great coaching point. And so, you know, when I was a coach and a kid would do that, they'd get burnt and come over the sidelines and say, are you hurt or injured? You know, if you're injured, then you're out of the game. Like, I need to make sure you're okay. If you're hurt, you know, let's just figure out what happened there.
JB Glossinger [00:07:00]:
Right? And a lot of times I'd be like, are you really hurt, or are you just hurt psychologically? And it feels like your ankle got twisted because you just got burned on that play. Right? So it's a really great coaching point to build somebody up. But I see it in general society with a lot of people who have gone through things and they allow those things to control them. They allow those things to learn. They lost and so they make excuses. They lost so they cry and whine. And we all do it. Look.
JB Glossinger [00:07:24]:
I'm gonna raise my hand. Nobody wants to lose. Right? On the golf course, I could tell you that we there's always building excuses. Oh, it was windy. It was rainy. Oh, I just didn't have it today. My back was sore. You know? Those are all just excuses.
JB Glossinger [00:07:37]:
And so what I'm here today is to get you through that. Right? I want you to have some tools that when you start getting into that mode, like, oh, it's Monday. I just didn't have the energy and I made a mistake. No. You just sucked. Right? And then we're all gonna suck at things. It's like just acknowledge that and say, okay, how do I get better? You're gonna grow as a human being if you get that way. So what are some tools? Okay, so number 1, first one acknowledge responsibility.
JB Glossinger [00:08:00]:
Recognize that while some things may be outside of your control, how you respond is different. That's the sense of ownership. You know, the best in the world don't win every time. So the way you react is going to tell me a lot about your belief system. I can't remember what book or where we were reading that, but it was like if you observe yourself and the way to the way you react to situations is gonna tell you your consciousness level. Very deep thing, but if you you you understand that, you're going to be able to see that, wow, okay, I am not acknowledging responsibility. I didn't take responsibility for it, and now I'm just allowing that to, you know, propel me the other side. And the problem with that is is when you don't acknowledge responsibility and you don't take it, you just allow it to fester.
JB Glossinger [00:08:45]:
Right? And you're never able to get out of that situation. And a lot of people are dealing with this. Not, you know, every morning coach. Most people that listen are positive and, you know, they're working on themselves, getting their mission and stuff. But, man, you go out in society today, and I hate it with our youth, you will just hear a lot of different ideas and thoughts that don't accept responsibility for where somebody is, and they just they just will never get over that hump, and they're just not empowered. And and what's sad is a lot of parents, a lot of society is enabling those people, And I feel bad for them because it's definitely not a place to be. Listen, when you're walking over the sidelines limping, nobody wants to do that. Man, we wanna be a champion.
JB Glossinger [00:09:26]:
And you sit there, oh, I'm hurt. I'm gonna sit out the rest of the game. That's like the saddest thing in the world. Right? And believe me, I've been there. I've done stupid stuff like that. So acknowledge responsibility. We're in the place where we're at for whatever reason right here. You know, all the problems that I've had in my life, everything that I've done wrong, there's so many things that have gone backwards, and so many things have happened.
JB Glossinger [00:09:45]:
And guess what? I've looked in the mirror, and the same person's always showing up. Right? You look in the mirror, and there he is. That's the person that's been involved in all the good, bad, and the negative. And, again, the second thing we wanna do is reframe negative thoughts because a lot of times it's not negative. You get burnt. You learn from it. What happened? Was it an inside move, outside move? Don't let it happen again. Right? So practice catching yourself when you think negative, like, wow, this always happens to me.
JB Glossinger [00:10:08]:
I can't control it. And really reframe it to what can I learn from this or how can I move forward? It will really change the way you live your life. And talk about leading by example. This is what we need more of in the world. Right? We wanna challenge your limiting beliefs. So often, a lot of times, victim mentality comes from beliefs that keep us feeling power powerless. Right? So we gotta question those beliefs. Are they serving you? Are they not serving you? And this can be challenging.
JB Glossinger [00:10:35]:
It's depending on where you grew up, where you're from. I mean, I go to Colombia. Right? So in some areas in Colombia, there is zero opportunity. Like, there's no a city to add Bolivia, You are not gonna be able to come out of there. I mean, the very few people do. There are some. And I understand that. I empathize with those people.
JB Glossinger [00:10:52]:
But the people that do crawl out of that and get themselves in a position to get out of that, they don't have those limiting beliefs. Somebody in their life empowered them to believe that they could get out of see it city dad Bolivia. If you don't believe it, you won't have it happen. So we gotta do a better job ourselves just personally doing that. I wish our educational system did a better job of that, but they don't. They actually it's going the opposite direction with that. So we've got a really challenging the beliefs that you have that aren't serving you. I always talk about, like, 7 years of bad luck when you break a mirror.
JB Glossinger [00:11:23]:
Why would you do that? Why step on a crack, break your mother's back? Right? These are stupid beliefs. Stupid. Why, you know, black crosses your path. I have a black cat crossing my path every day. Do you think it's bad luck? Hell, no. I don't want that damn belief. Change your beliefs. Right? It's really important, and I know it's difficult.
JB Glossinger [00:11:40]:
Look. This is not easy depending on where you come from and and what's going on, but this is what we gotta do. This is the work we gotta do. Focus on gratitude. Identify small things and be grateful for them. We've got it in our planner and the new one. Wake up in the morning and find a few things to be grateful for. One thing I'll tell you is don't do the same things every time.
JB Glossinger [00:11:58]:
Try to change it up a little bit every day. Set some small goals. Get some momentum. A lot of this has to do with belief and building on on, you know, your your the things that you could do. Little goals will lead to bigger goals. You know, you wanna learn guitar, learn John Denver's Take Me Home Country Road. Learn the g string. You know, learn g chord, learn c chord this month.
JB Glossinger [00:12:19]:
Two chords, that's it. Small goals, they'll take you there. Get support, talk to family, friends, or a therapist. Right? So when I talk about some of the deeper issues, maybe you've got some deeper issues. And, again, I wanna preface this. Right? There when I talk about victim mentality, some people get upset because of that term victim mentality. Say, well, there are true victims. Yes.
JB Glossinger [00:12:41]:
There are. There are people that have been you know, I I don't even wanna go there in the negative, but there are people that have had a lot of bad things happen to them, and I'm acknowledging that. I'm not saying it hasn't happened. There are a lot of people out there that haven't had horrific things happen and are still victims, but there are people that have had horrific things. So in those cases, talk to a therapist, get an outside perspective. Right? My job is to get you stronger. My job is to get you to look and be introspective of why you're saying the things that you're saying. And if you're sitting there and going, JB, but I went through this and it was drastic, right, and I get it, okay, and you're like angry at me for even having this conversation, then you need to discuss with therapy, Okay? Couple other things, we need to have self compassion.
JB Glossinger [00:13:23]:
We talk about self love, that's part of this, or self care, that's part of this. You have to have really a great feeling of energy. You have to feel good about yourself. Everyone struggles at times. You need to be kind to yourself and avoid feeling things are just happening to you. Approach things constructively. Self love is the first love. And finally, you wanna build resilience.
JB Glossinger [00:13:49]:
You know, engage in activities that build like journaling, mindfulness, physical exercise. These practice reinforce the belief that you're strong and capable. I think one of the biggest things for me has been running, obviously, and then the other is the ice bath. The ice bath creates resilience. When you're in there at 42 degrees, used to be 3 minutes, I now do 4, there are days where that's freezing cold. Okay? And I'm at 42, I'm good. I don't think I'll get any lower in that. I don't think it ain't getting benefit, but the real benefit people say, why do you do that? It's the mental strength that I get it, the resilience that it builds.
JB Glossinger [00:14:19]:
It's that ability to not quit, to sit there and shiver and feel that cold. And and and between me and you, what it feels like now is when I get in there, I'm I don't like the cold. I hate the cold. That's why I went to Florida. I I'm a Florida guy, you know, and when I get that water, it feels like somebody just put a cold blanket over me and I love it now I absolutely love it. I don't know if I can go a day without it. I mean I just love waking up and doing that cold plunge. It's awesome.
JB Glossinger [00:14:44]:
So do activities that will help you build resilience. But I want you to get over that loser's limb. We all have it. We all have background issues and and there more will come guaranteed. And we got to suck it up. We got to find what why it's happening and then make the changes accordingly. That will help you live your life. Okay? We all have this.
JB Glossinger [00:15:02]:
Believe me. I get it. Let's try to get stronger. Let's try to get more resilient and work our plan, which we're closing out right now this month so that we can start working on 2025. Alright. So let's get out there. Have a great day. You know I love you.
JB Glossinger [00:15:15]:
Go have a good one, and I'll see you over in the community in morning coach.com.
